Second chance? I'm sorry, what was wrong with my first chance?

So, my family does not know of my spiritual path.  They think I'm still Christian.  Why?  Because I haven't told them I'm Pagan.  Why?  Because the Christians I have told shunned me, and with the cancer battle, to lose my brother and his family so soon after getting them back from a seven year estrangement due to my standing up for Gay rights, is just not something I'm looking forward to.  So...I keep silent.  I let them preach, I let them talk about their faith, and I bite my tongue and say nothing when I think I'm going to rip my hair out by the roots.

Then the news of my beating cancer comes.  My brother tells me:  "God's given you a second chance."  I swear, I think they memorize a script.  It's like those are the words they ALL have to say at a time like this.  I sat there and wondered:  "Given me a second chance?  I'm sorry, what was wrong with my first chance at life?"  I was LOVING my life before the cancer hit.  I was focusing on my writing, but...I was not focusing on what the Universe had called me to do which was to teach, to practice and apply what I had learned in my Pagan studies.  I didn't look at the cancer as a means to obtain a 'second chance', but a LESSON FOR my life.  The cancer led me to where I'm studying Science of Mind, now.  I attend a spiritual center and am learning how to face what many would look at as 'uphill' battles and how to clear the hills and ease on down the other side.  I'm learning how there's a science behind 'miracles' (or magick as in my frame of thinking).  I'm learning how to live.

The cancer was not a wake-up call.  It was a means for me to address where my life was going.  I'm back in the saddle with my writing, but...I'm adding 'teaching' to the itinerary.  I said to the Universe that if they healed me, I would teach.  Teach what?  Whatever they wanted me to teach.  I have an opportunity to become a Practitioner at my spiritual center and I'm going to grab it.  I can learn and pass on what I learn.  But...here's the main thing...small, no doubt, only a first step, but the Universe is moving fast.

Doc is so happy with the progress I'm making with the cancer being beaten.  It's literally heading out the door and out of my life.  So, no sooner do I get this news then I attend a class at my Religious Science center.  I bring up Wicca philosophies.  The lady next to me says, "Would you like to teach a workshop on Wicca?  We consider ourselves an Inter-faith church, but we don't know much about Wicca."  I say, "I would LOVE to do a workshop!  That would be great!"  She clears it with the Reverend and...the process begins.  I am to teach a workshop sometime in January.  Fast moving, but I'm up to the challenge.  It's just a two hour overview of Wiccan beliefs.  But...I'm teaching.

On the way home from the class, I was grinning from ear to ear.  It's not a second chance, it's an opportunity for me to grab what I'd been afraid to grab onto before.  An opportunity...to pass it forward.  The Universe asked me to teach before and I didn't think I could...the cancer was not a second chance...it was a lesson to teach me how NOT to be uncertain about who and what I am or what I believe.

My life is back on track...only the track has widened.  I plan on teaching and learning and moving forward with my life...and will watch as the first calling manifests into the now and what wonders I will see and share with others.

Not a 'second chance'...a continuation of what I had been learning before.  The cancer was not a bad thing.  It was a lesson.  And like all lessons the homework can be pretty tough, but what you learn from them...stay with you forever.

And...if in other POV's this IS a second chance...then I'll take my seconds to-go, please.  I have a life to get back to.

Thanks for listening/reading.
In perfect Love, and perfect Trust,
Myristica

First lesson that challenged me...

I know this sounds really, really dramatic, but in fighting cancer (they gave me 15% chance survival rate-soft tissue/muscle cancer Leiomyosarcoma), the fight led me to where I am pursuing a spiritual path-working I never would have considered before.  Religious Science.  Science of Mind.  If you've never heard of Emma Curtis Hopkins or Ernest Holmes, and if you are curious as to the science behind positive thinking and prayer, these are the people who started it.  Actually it was Emma Curtis Hopkins who taught Ernest Holmes.  She has been labeled the Teacher of teachers because her students went on to form Unity and Religious Science (Holmes) and so many others dealing with the same discipline of mind/religious sciences.

 I am taking a class based on a workbook called 'Unveiling the Power Within You' (Edited by modern writer Ruth Miller).  This workbook will blow your mind.  Miller incorporates the teachings of Hopkins from both her "Scientific Mental Practice" text as well as the text "High Mysticism" and HM's practice book "Resume'".

I'm only 3 classes into this study and already, after the first two lessons, I can see where my 'thoughts' have erred over the years and how in order to truly heal my 'soul' as well as my 'body' I need to shift belief.
Hopkins once worked with Mary Baker Eddy, but could not wrap her mind (to use modern vernacular) around some of Eddy's beliefs, and so broke off to form her own philosophy based on 'Christian Science'.  Some will get turned off by Hopkins' association with Eddy, but please note:  Hopkins disagreed with some of Eddy's teachings and therefore was able to free up many of them to be more in line with the teachings of the Christ.
I am 'starting' to understand why 'matter' is believed to not be real.  This teaching in particular is hard to swallow for many people, but there is a scientific reasoning behind it.  I'm not well-versed in it enough to dive too deeply into it here, but suffice it to say that our perception, interpretation, of what we see can and does affect our lives.
According to Hopkins there is no evil.  We went over this teaching last night in class and I walked away extremely hopeful that the teaching is correct.
God=Love
God=Truth
God=Substance
God=All Good
God=Omnipresence (everywhere)
If God is ALL Good (there can be found no iniquity or evil within Him) and if he is EVERYWHERE, then there is no place where God isn't, and if God is EVERYWHERE and He is all Love, Truth and Good, then there is no place where evil can reside.  The 'idea' of evil is the belief of man that there is 'lack of Good' in our lives.  Notice I said, 'belief'...not fact.

This is a thought process that metaphorically blew my mind.  I have more to say on this subject especially regarding my so-called 'illness', but will have to put it off until later after work.  I am doing this in the morning and need to get ready for work now.  But, I leave you with the above to think about for the day (or evening, depending on when you are reading this).

I know it's a lot to digest, but the logic behind the belief that God is EVERYWHERE and that He is ALL Good...it does beg the question; Then is there really evil?  Or is the 'idea' of evil simply created in order to sustain our fears that we have 'lack of Good' in our lives?

Doesn't even the possibility of 'no evil' make you want to investigate this further?  It does for me.  Think about it...'evil' is 'present' because people desire 'Good' to be in their lives, so they step over everyone else to obtain it, because they 'believe' it is lacking in their lives.  But, if they shifted their thoughts to believe that God is ALL Good and that He is EVERYWHERE, and that He is our Good, our Supply, our Health, our Joy, our LIFE, then the 'idea' of evil will disappear.

I know this all sounds wayyyyy out there and I'm still struggling with it myself, but it is enough to push me forward to investigate and question further.  And I'm ok with that.  My belief and where it is going may not be yours and I will never impose such on you.  Please do me the same courtesy.  These 'spiritual path-working' posts are meant for those who 'may' wish to investigate the same things, not for those who do not.

Thank you.
Myristica